Finding Brave :: Introduction

When I first sat down to begin writing my experience with anxiety and depression, I didn’t have a fixed goal in mind.  I was simply aware that the words needed to fill a page. My story needed to be shared, even if it was just with a small group of friends.

If there is one thing that I want to convey through my words, it’s the idea of freedom. I want more than anything for people to be free.

I lived for ten years with physical and mental chains around my body.  I felt an overwhelming urgency to run, and yet my feet were enveloped in quicksand. I wasn’t sure I would ever feel “normal” again.

What is normal, anyway?

Normal is defined by the Merriam Webster dictionary as “not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle.” Another description is “conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern.” One definition even goes so far as to say, “free from mental illness :  mentally sound.”

My question in response to this information is this, “If so many people struggle with fear, anxiety, and depression, what does that say about the concept of normalcy?”

Why is it that so many of us can’t seem to break free to live a “normal” life?

I believe that one of the reasons it took me so long to find healing is because of the stigma attached to mental health concerns. I didn’t want a label.  I didn’t want sympathy.  I didn’t want to be different.  So, instead, I lived my anxiety out as secretly as I could.  My body suffered. My family suffered. And, my mind suffered to such a great extent, that I became physically sick as a result.

Every human will be faced with periods of pain, moments of fear and seasons of emotional ups and downs.  That is the normal part of life.  What wasn't okay, is what I experienced for a ten year period of my life. I lived a life with a preoccupation with worry, fear, and distress. I was terrified on a daily basis. I was bound with chains that felt impossible to break free from.

My journey to healing isn’t complete, because my story isn’t complete. There are however, intricate layers of healing that have brought me to a place of wholeness.  I refuse to give up. And I won't stop telling others about how I am being delivered from bondage.

I'm happy to share my story with you.

It is my prayer that you find freedom from your chains of fear and anxiety, and that this book could be instrumental in helping you further along that path. Or if you love someone who fights this battle, that you would have more insight into their pain.

With Grace & Truth,
Jamie

Click to read Chapter One